Spumoni Day celebrates the layered ice cream, which comes with fruit and nuts, so it’s technically part of your five-a-day. Today is also Senior Citizens Day, celebrating ancient human people.
What better way to combine the two occasions than by feeding an old person slabs of ice cream? Will they take out their teeth and slobber it down? Will they gurn like an orangutan due to the coldness? Will it dribble out the sides of their mouths and stain their best knitted blouse? Hard to say; but it’ll be fun finding out.
And for anyone who thinks I’m the devil, bear in mind that it’ll be a nice treat for them.
Richard Sutherland is the author of 'The Unitary Authority of Ersatz', a quirky collection of short stories and humorous poetry. His favourite colour is Cornish Pasty and he loves the smell of confusion. Richard also writes Twitter fiction; tales within 140 characters. You should follow him, it's what all the cool kids are doing. @Banana_Penguin and @tinyweefiction.
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