So it’s Garage Sale Day, and though I don’t have a garage, I always have junk I can sell to some idi… er… bargain hunter.

The usual suspects of a clear out were there, from used trainers that no one in their right mind would buy, even if they weren’t a size 15, to Happy Meal toys from the nineties. But what should I find stashed amongst the old magazines and unwanted Christmas presents, squeezed behind the knackered garden furniture and beneath a spare duvet that’s as comfortable as a bag full of plugs, but Robert Green Ingersoll, the nineteenth century American orator who campaigned for minority and women’s rights.

I think I was given him for a birthday a few years ago by an obscure relative. Naturally I already had one, as I’m sure we all do, so I popped this spare into storage and completely forgot about him.

So yeah, if anyone’s Ingersoll has broken and they need a nice shiny new one, just give me a call, especially seeing how today is also Ingersoll Day – you wouldn’t want to turn up to a commemorative picnic without one, you’d look a right numpty!


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