I’m not sure who’s reading this blog post. Maybe I know you, maybe I don’t. Perhaps we went to school or university together, or worked at the same business for a while, or are friends on Facebook even though we’ve never actually seen each other in real life. Or perhaps you’re a complete stranger, be it nearby or in a far away country; someone I will never meet or even exchange digital greetings with. But you know what? Whatever the case may be, come Saturday I bet you’ll have a great day because, put quite simply, you’re the most awesome person I know.
Saturday 1st March is World Compliment Day, so consider my previous remark a freebie and a warm-up. An occasion dedicated to making people feel better about themselves, we’re all encouraged to dish out compliments to friends, coworkers and sometimes even strangers, but the key is to make sure you come across as genuine, and the recipient must accept your offering or it doesn’t really count. Here are some of my foolproof examples, which are almost completely guaranteed to work:
- Hey, do you smell that? I can smell eggs. Is it you? I love eggs. It’s you, isn’t it?
- Whoa, great shoes. One left and one right, eh? A wise choice.
- Your hair looks nice today. Have you washed it?
- Would you mind scratching my lower back? You’re the only person I’d trust to do it.
- Can I borrow a fiver? I’ll pay you back soon because I know how frugal you are, which is very responsible.
- Don’t I know you from somewhere? Aren’t you on a poster for sexual health?
- Madam, never have I met a woman with such a hairless upper lip.
- I used to hate your guts when I first met you but I don’t anywhere near as much now.
- Nice glasses, I bet your eyes can see through them really well.
- Did you know that your hair is so perfect that everyone thinks it’s a wig?
- Man, you’re the spitting image of Danny DeVito! I bet you get all the girls, looking like a famous person.
- I live across the street. Your bedroom wallpaper is very tasteful.
- Have I ever told you that I love your wife?
Hopefully that’s enough to keep you going. However, use these compliments sparingly, as offloading all of them onto the same person within a few minutes would be a waste. Sure, they’d love it (who wouldn’t?), but telling them that they smell like eggs and look like Danny DeVito may result in their head swelling so much that it won’t fit through the door. Plus you can also come up with new compliments if you exhaust the above list, so be creative and bring smiles to faces all day long with your unfailing charm.
NB. As a general rule of thumb, commenting on someone’s lack of BO is always a sure-fire winner.