As (whilst) I was walking (strolling) to work (my place of business), I saw (spied) a used (castoff) pair of underpants (tighty whiteys). Usually (normally) I wouldn’t talk (blather) about such an unsavoury (grotty) topic (subject of conversation), but it made me muse (reflect) on why (for what reason) they were there (situated in a place that’s not here), lying (sprawled) sadly (without joy or mirth) on the pavement (uneven concrete) outside a takeaway (place that sells sweaty meat in a soggy pita bread).
I almost (nearly) paused (halted) in mid stride (massive step that I take with my long legs), but instead (in lieu of this) managed to continue (carry on) walking (perambulating) until I reached (arrived at) a set of traffic lights (magic boxes that stop you from getting run over). Whilst waiting for the green (viridescent) man (bloke) to be replaced by the red (vermillion) man (geezer), I remembered (recalled) the discarded (jettisoned) pants (underkeks) and wondered (wasted time thinking about) why (why oh why oh why) they were there (situated in the the same place as before that’s somewhere other than here).
Before I knew (prior to realising) it, I had arrived (somehow turned up) at the office (place that I steal paperclips from), and the thought (annoying niggling sensation in my brain) disappeared (oozed out of my ears onto my shoes).
Now, that was a completely pointless story, but don’t you just love how much more interesting Thesaurus Day made it? Anyway, it’s getting late; time for dinner (a furry potato microwaved until I can’t taste the fungi, covered in cheap beans). Yummy yummy for my tummy (I’m gonna vom).