Are you a big shot with your own staff? Minions and underlings doing your bidding and satisfying your every whim? Whether you’re a CEO of a gargantuan megacorp or in charge of the guys who clean the toilets, show your team how much you value their hard work on Friday 7th March, Employee Appreciation Day.
We all know how hard it is being the head honcho. Each day you’re swamped with spreadsheets, board meetings, site visits, interviews, helicopter journeys, golf tournaments, paperclip salesmen, powwows, working lunches, Audi TT test drives, annual reviews, base touching, choosing which shade of lilac to use for the new brochure, hanging fruit on the lowest branch, being sued for negligence, or whatever it is you do to earn an honest living. You’re such a trooper and your partner and kids would be proud, if only they could remember what your face looks like behind that copy of the Financial Times
However, that doesn’t mean you have an excuse to ignore those that work for you and take them for granted, so here are some suggestions on how to make your employees feel an essential part of the company:
- Buy a round of coffees. Not the vending machine kind. (Okay, it can be the vending machine kind.) And buy some chocolate flakes to go with it. (A single M&M each? Yeah, sure, that’ll be fine.)
- When’s the last time you hugged your staff? Probably never due to it likely being misconstrued as sexual harassment. In that case, carry on not hugging your staff.
- Work in an office that runs from Monday to Friday? Give everyone a couple of days off. I recommend Saturday and Sunday.
- Get the photocopier fixed. Employees love an excuse to be more productive.
- Stationery Amnesty Week! Woooo!
Implementing all five of the above will separate the wheat from the chaff. If you have any staff left after Friday 7th March, they’ll be the strongest and most valued team of employees around. You’re such a good dictator.