Self Love Day

Ladies and gentlemen, every year—before it’s time to shower that special someone in your life with affection—there’s a day set aside to pause, reflect, and turn some of that attention inward.

Yes, you deserve just as much love as the person you care for. That’s the idea behind Self Love Day, observed annually on the day before Valentine’s Day.

Self-love isn’t about being self-centered, ignoring others, or chasing perfection. It’s a grounded, practical relationship with yourself. It means speaking with basic kindness, making choices that support your health and values, and treating your needs as valid rather than optional.

At its best, self-love becomes a steady foundation—one that makes relationships stronger, work more sustainable, and everyday stress easier to handle. When you care for yourself well, you’re no longer running on fumes, approval, or constant comparison.

How to Celebrate Self Love Day

Considering some different ways that you might want to enjoy and celebrate on Self Love Day? Check out some of these interesting ideas:

A helpful way to approach this day is to think in three categories: body, mind, and environment. Body includes rest, movement, nourishment, and medical care. Mind includes boundaries, self-talk, creativity, and emotional processing.

The environment includes the people, spaces, and routines that either support or drain someone. Self Love Day can be a gentle reset across all three, even if it’s done in small steps.

Fall Madly In Love With Yourself

One of the best ways to celebrate Self Love Day is to begin practicing habits that help you become the best version of yourself—for you, not to please someone else. Take some time, especially on this day, to practice self-love and set aside space for the things you genuinely enjoy.

That might be as simple as a 30-minute bubble bath with headphones and a favorite novel, blocking out the world for a while. Or it could mean heading to the spa for a full day of pampering. The point isn’t the activity itself—it’s giving yourself a little uninterrupted “me” time.

To make that time truly restorative, intention matters. Instead of squeezing relaxation into the leftover scraps of a busy schedule, choose—deliberately—to make your well-being part of the plan. That could mean putting your phone on do not disturb, letting the housework wait, or giving loved ones a simple heads-up: “I’m taking an hour to recharge.”

Here are a few practical ways to “fall madly in love” with the person in the mirror, without turning it into a huge project:

• Do a mini check-in. Ask, “What do I need right now?” Then answer as a supportive friend would. The answer might be sleep, water, quiet, a good cry, or a brisk walk.
  
• Practice the basics with extra respect. Eating a balanced meal, taking a shower, stretching, or going to bed on time can be deeply self-loving when done with care rather than punishment.
  
• Create a “yes list.” Write down five activities that reliably make life feel better, even in small ways—making tea, listening to a favorite album, cooking something comforting, sitting in the sun, organizing a drawer, or calling a friend who truly listens.
  
• Try a kindness swap. Replace one common self-criticism with a neutral or kind statement. Instead of “I’m terrible at this,” try “I’m learning, and it’s okay to be imperfect while I learn.”
  
• Give your future self a gift. Self-love isn’t only an indulgence. It can be prepping tomorrow’s lunch, paying a bill, scheduling a checkup, or tidying a space so the next morning feels calmer.

It’s also worth remembering that self-love can include saying “no.” Declining a draining commitment, stepping away from a heated conversation, or limiting time with someone who consistently undermines your confidence can be just as nurturing as any spa day.

Sometimes, the most romantic thing a person can do for themselves is to stop abandoning their own needs to keep everyone else comfortable.

Read the Book by Christine Arylo

One superb way to fully step into Self Love Day is to read the book that inspired it all: Madly In Love With ME: The Daring Adventure To Becoming Your Own Best Friend, written by the day’s founder, Christine Arylo.

The book explores why learning to love yourself isn’t a luxury—it’s a prerequisite for healthy relationships, meaningful work, and emotional resilience. Among its core ideas are these reminders:

• Go after your dreams with conviction and courage.
• Choose situations and relationships that encourage you and genuinely make you happier.
• Speak to yourself with kindness instead of criticism or comparison.
• Explore your deepest desires and learn how to act on them, not ignore them.

Reading a self-development book on Self Love Day works best when it becomes more than underlining a few inspiring lines. A more powerful approach is to read slowly and treat the book like a conversation. If a passage sparks resistance, discomfort, or a quiet “ouch, that’s me,” that reaction can be valuable information rather than a reason to stop. Self-love often begins with honest noticing.

To help turn insight into action, a reader might try one of these approaches:

• Keep a “best friend” journal. After each chapter, write a short note to yourself as if you were writing to someone you deeply care about. Keep the tone supportive, clear, and grounded.
  
• Identify a personal pattern. Notice habits such as over-apologizing, people-pleasing, perfectionism, or comparison. Choose one and ask what it’s protecting. Perfectionism may guard against criticism; people-pleasing may avoid conflict.
  
• Make dreams concrete. “Go for your dreams” becomes manageable when broken into a small next step: a class to research, a portfolio to update, a conversation to schedule, or time intentionally blocked off.
  
• Create a language shift. Start with one kind, steady phrase repeated daily: “I’m allowed to take up space,” “I can do hard things,” or “I’m not behind—I’m on my path.”

Because Self Love Day sits so close to a culture-heavy celebration of romance, reading about self-acceptance can also be a quiet antidote to pressure.

Not everyone is partnered. Not every relationship feels magical. Not every heart is in a celebratory mood. Self Love Day makes space for all of that, while offering a grounding reminder: a person’s worth is not defined by someone else’s attention.

Check Out More Self Love Resources

Those who aren’t used to practices like self-love shouldn’t shy away from them on Self Love Day. Even when it feels awkward or unfamiliar, self-love is a skill that can be learned—and learning it is often a powerful form of personal growth.

One especially helpful resource for learning how to practice self-love is The Path of Self Love, the website connected to the day itself. It offers a wide range of tools, including self-love workshops, trainings, books, coaching, assessments, and more. There’s even a free Self Love Kit available through the site, making it easier to explore the idea without pressure or commitment.

Resources like these can be especially valuable for people who genuinely don’t know what self-love looks like in real life. For some, “love yourself” sounds like a poster slogan. For others, it can trigger discomfort, because self-kindness feels unfamiliar—or even unsafe. Clear guidance, prompts, and structured practices help turn an abstract idea into something tangible and doable.

When choosing resources, it helps to look for ones that support both insight and action. Insight helps clarify what’s happening internally—feelings, beliefs, triggers, and unmet needs. Action turns awareness into change through boundaries, routines, and follow-through. The most effective tools usually offer both.

Here are a few resource-based ways to mark Self Love Day without feeling overwhelmed:

• Try a guided reflection. Prompts about values, energy drains, or self-talk can be eye-opening. Someone might realize they aren’t “lazy,” but simply exhausted from carrying too much.
• Join a group practice. Self-love can feel easier with community support, whether through a workshop, a coaching space, or a small group agreeing to practice kinder self-talk and clearer boundaries.
• Use assessments as a starting point, not a label. Self-checks can highlight patterns like burnout or inner criticism, but their real value comes from what follows: more rest, clearer priorities, or extra support.
• Pair learning with a tiny habit. After reading or watching something on self-worth, choose one small action—taking a five-minute walk, eating breakfast, or turning notifications off for an hour in the evening.

It’s also important to remember that self-love can include seeking professional support when needed. Therapy, counseling, and medical care aren’t signs of failure; they’re acts of self-respect. Self Love Day can be a gentle nudge to schedule an appointment that’s been postponed, refill a prescription, address lingering pain, or simply ask for help.

Finally, self-love isn’t meant to become another performance metric. The goal isn’t to “do self-care perfectly.” The goal is to build a relationship with yourself that’s steady and dependable. Some days that looks like journaling and yoga. Other days, it looks like taking a nap and letting the laundry wait.

History of Self Love Day

Self Love Day was founded in 2008 by Californian self-help guru Christine Arylo, author of the book, _Madly In Love With ME: The Daring Adventure To Becoming Your Own Best Friend_.

The philosophy is that to truly be able to show love to others, a person must first be empowered to love herself without apology. And while the book may be specifically geared toward women, there’s certainly no reason to discriminate because this concept can apply to all humans!

Also sometimes referred to as Madly in Love with Me Day, this day offers a time that is dedicated to throwing away those diet books, treating yourself to your favorite lunch in the company of people you know love and making a habit of respecting yourself just as you are today – and every day.

Self Love Day was created as a counterbalance to the way “love season” can put attention on romance, appearance, and external validation.

By placing self love right before Valentine’s Day, the message becomes clear: love is not only something to give away or chase down. It is also something to cultivate internally, regardless of relationship status.

Christine Arylo’s work frames self love as an active, lived practice rather than a vague feeling. That practical framing matters.

Many people assume self love is something a person either has or doesn’t have, like a personality trait. The day’s emphasis suggests the opposite: self love can be strengthened through daily choices, language, and boundaries.

The alternate name, “Madly in Love with Me Day,” adds a playful tone, but the idea underneath is serious. “Madly” is not about ego. It’s about devotion, as in: consistently showing up for oneself the way a caring partner or best friend would. That includes celebrating strengths, acknowledging needs, and offering compassion during mistakes or setbacks.

The day’s themes often challenge a few common myths:

– Myth: Self love is selfish. Reality: Self respect and personal care often make someone more present, generous, and emotionally regulated around others.

– Myth: Self love is only about pampering. Reality: It can include hard choices like leaving a toxic dynamic, addressing addictions, setting boundaries, or changing habits that cause harm.

– Myth: Self love means constant confidence. Reality: It can exist alongside insecurity, sadness, or anxiety. It simply changes how a person responds to those feelings.

Self Love Day also fits into a broader cultural shift toward talking about mental health, burnout, and personal boundaries.

While the day has a specific founder and an associated book, the concept resonates widely because it addresses something universal: most people have an inner voice, and that voice can either support them or wear them down.

A day devoted to recalibrating that inner relationship is a small but meaningful invitation to choose support.

In the spirit of “throwing away those diet books,” the day also encourages a more respectful relationship with the body. That doesn’t require ignoring health or abandoning goals. It means moving away from shame-based motivation and toward care-based decisions.

Eating well, moving the body, and resting become acts of partnership with the self, not punishment.

Ultimately, Self Love Day endures because it is simple and adaptable. It doesn’t require gifts, reservations, or grand declarations. It requires one honest decision: to treat oneself with the same basic kindness that is so freely offered to others.